Wanting What the World Cannot Give

By Niranjan Matanich

Why do I feel such a deep sense of dissatisfaction? My life is great, my needs are met. I have extra resources so I can do the things I want. I have many people that I care about in my life. Yet, I have an underlying dissatisfaction.

This feeling keeps me looking for something to make me feel satisfied, usually it’s some material thing. But you know what, that new Judas Priest record didn’t do it. Neither did the new seat on my motorcycle. Turns out binging on donuts isn’t it either.

On some level, I know that material items aren’t going to fill the void I feel. Having just the right kind of relationship isn’t going to do it either. In fact, nothing in this whole world is going to fill that inner void. Maybe you’ve experienced some of this dissatisfaction, too.

This underlying dissatisfaction is a deep yearning. A deep yearning to know who you are. The yearning is there to direct you to look inward to find that you are the Self.  You are the one Consciousness that has manifested this whole universe and beyond but, through the process of creation, you have forgotten your Self. The yearning is Consciousness, your own Self arising within, calling you to your Self. Without this yearning, you never have any impulse to look beyond the outer world.  You don’t discover your own Divinity.

This yearning will lead you to a Guru who can awaken your Kundalini, the dormant energy coiled at the base of your spine. This energy animates your body; it’s the energy that has manifested this entire world. When Kundalini is awakened, you turn within and become aware of your inner Self. The goal of this awakening is to become established in the knowing of your own Self.  This is described in a pivotal sutra:

Udyamo bhairava.h — Shiva Sutras 1.5

Swami Muktananda defines it this way. “When the Guru’s Grace is received, one’s Shakti is unfolded… meditation comes spontaneously… The seeker turns within. Awareness of the inner Self begins to throb all the time within him. To stay in this awareness is the right effort for the seeker.”

Once your receive this awakening, the right effort is to stay in this awareness — of your own Self. When you are feeling that yearning, rather than trying to avoid it by indulging in material things, you choose to meditate or repeat the mantra your Guru gave you.

Making that choice becomes easier after you’ve received the Guru’s Grace because you know what the yearning is. And you know what to do to when you are feeling it. It’s true, sometimes I still forget and think the answer is in the new thing. Sometimes you’ll forget, but the Guru’s Grace ALWAYS leads you back to your own Self!

OM svaroopa svasvabhavah namo namah

To your Inherent Divinity again and again I bow.

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