By Swami Shrutananda
“I am right here!” I heard a gleeful voice say. It was an answer to a question I had put out there, somewhere into the cosmos, just at the beginning of my meditation.
I had desperately asked, “God! Where are you?” To my surprise there was an immediate answer. A playful voice, my own voice, saying to me, “I am right here!”
My mind was so surprised. It is like when someone taps your knee to check your reflexes. Your knee moves before your mind can register what happened. In the same way my mind was surprised because the answer did not come from my mind. It arose from a deeper place within.
I didn’t have an image in my mind of some white bearded God up in the sky speaking to me in a big booming voice. It was my voice. “I am right here!” — which meant I am God.
Right here, within my own body, God is being me. Right here, within your own body, God is being you. God is aways right here being me, being you. Now I know what Gurudevi Nirmalananda means when she says, “God, the Self, is closer than your breath.”
In the Vivekachudamani, the great sage Shankaracharya gives two names to that One Divine Reality:
When you see That Supreme Reality outside yourself, you know the One Existence which is called Brahman. When you know That Supreme Reality inside yourself, you know Atman, which is your own Self. — Rendered by Gurudevi Nirmalananda
The name depends on where you are looking. Most people look outside to find that Greater Reality, which in yoga is called Brahman. Some look for God in nature, others somewhere out there, up there and so on.
Yoga agrees that God is found outside. Everything outside yourself from that One Divine Essence down to a single blade of grass is God — Brahman.
Yet yoga turns this around and says to look within yourself to experience that One Divine Reality. When you look inside, that same Divine Essence is called Atman. Shankaracharya is saying Brahman = Atman and Atman = Brahman.
There is only One, whether you are looking inside or outside. Is it easier to look inside or outside to experience, to know your own Divine Self?
In another passage from the Vivekachudamani, Shankaracharya says:
Here, within your own body through your own mind… the “Self” shines in its captivating splendor like a noonday sun. — Rendered by Gurudevi Nirmalananda
To experience your own Divinity, you start with your body. We do this in every yoga class. Svaroopa® yoga teaches you how to get embodied, to be in your own body. This is why we start with Shavasana and the Guided Awareness. We start with your toes and track through each area of your body in turn. You feel the outer edges of your own individual form and then you look deeper within.
The Guided Awareness at the end of class culminates with “Being aware of your whole body … or being aware of awareness itself … or follow awareness into its source … Rest in That.” Now you experience something greater than your body, greater than your mind. Your awareness expands and deepens, and you experience your own Divine Essence. Being here, within your own body, is a doorway into the inner infinity of your own Beingness.
Also, in meditation we start with your body. You settle into your seat. Allow your body to be in an easy upright position. Let your breathing be easy. Once your body has settled, you apply your mind to mantra. Now you can go “through your own mind.” With mantra, you go deeper than your mind to experience your innermost Self.
In either case, in Shavasana or in meditation, you are applying your mind. You are giving your mind a direction of focus. Yet your mind is not the goal. You are not within your mind. You are looking through your mind to go beyond it. You are within your own body looking through your mind settling deeper inside.
Your body and your mind are the outermost levels of your own existence. When you look deeper inside your own body what will you discover? You will discover That which has always existed — “The Self shines in its captivating splendor like a noon day sun.” The Self, your own Self, is always shining fully within.
After I answered my own question about God, I contemplated my meditation. I thought how there are so many Gods in this world, yet they all don’t know they are God. This is the goal of yoga — for you to know you are God. To know you are the One Divine Reality. To know your own Self. Everyone is shining with Divine light, for it is your own Self arising from within.
Unfortunately, you are able to block that light with your mind. Just like you can use your thumb to block the sun. Who will help you to find your own Divinity?
That is the function of the Guru. The Guru is fully embodied, fully enlivened and know they are God: they are the Self, knowing their own Self.
You can only learn from someone who knows, who lives in this state of Self-Knowingness. This is why I have a Guru — Gurudevi Nirmalananda. She has dedicated her life to helping you experience and know you are God, the Self. You are already That.