Everyone wants equanimity, or so they say. But I don’t see people working on attaining it.
Mostly they follow the herd, led by the news, the politicians, the musicians, the social media influencers, and their family and friends. The whole point is to whip you up into a frenzy and keep you there until you collapse out of exhaustion, which makes you able to sleep. Then you get up and do it again.
You probably have tried to get a little peace by withdrawing from news, the politicians, the musicians, the social media influencers, and even you family and friends. But you bring your mind with you, even when you isolate yourself or numb out.
Another way you may try to attain equanimity is by having everyone in your life do what you want them to do. If they do what you want, then you will be even-minded. If the economy, if your job, if your family, if the plumbing doesn’t clog up – you can be at ease. If the world will simply go the way you want, you can be calm, peaceful and equanimous.
If you are working on equanimity by getting everyone to do what you want them to do, you’re not working on equanimity. You’re working on coercion and control of others.
Equanimity happens from your skin – inward. It’s not what you do to handle things outside of your skin. It’s what you do to handle you. Equanimous means that you are even-minded, no matter what happens.
O Dear One, he is qualified as a Guru who has such qualities as serenity, desirelessness, self-control, and equanimity in the face of praise and censure.
They are not buoyed up by compliments. They are not tormented by blame. They are serene in the midst of it all, even-minded. This is the Guru, of course. Not you. Except that the Guru is a yogi, who attained all these qualities before being appointed to serve as Guru.
It doesn’t say that being a Guru makes you serene, desireless and equanimous. It says that only one who has attained these qualities may serve as teacher. This comes from a section of the text that gives you ways to assess the Guru. Others of the yogic texts also give you similar lists that tell you what qualities to look for in a teacher.
As a Westerner, of course, I had never heard of Gurus, nor did I have a clue what to look for in one. But the tradition says that, while the Guru must test the disciple, the disciple must test the Guru. And exactly how do you do that? The truest measure is…
In Kurukshetra, Yudhishtra was looking at the massive army of the Kauravas, who were so ready to fight them.
He called upon Arjuna, saying, “The strength of the Kauravas is much more than ours, so we have to form our army in the needle point formation. This way, we can focus in a concentrated form, not spreading out in smaller numbers. This will prevent the attack of the enemy.”
Arjuna & Krishna1
Hearing this, Arjuna wanted to have a good look at the warriors who came to fight against them on behalf of the Kauravas. He told Krishna, who had offered to be his charioteer. Krishna drove the chariot, stopping it right in front of Grandsire Bhishma, Guru Drona and the Kauravas.
Arjuna was seeing his beloved, glorious Grandsire Bhishma, whom Arjuna respected and loved, along with his honorable Guru Drona, who was worthy of his reverence. Arjuna’s mind was confused. Doubt arose about his decisions to fight them.
He couldn’t take up arms against these great warriors who were worthy of his worship. The thought of killing loved ones in order to gain victory in the war shook his core. His heart was totally disturbed. He started questioning himself.
“Is it righteousness to battle with those who I always held in high esteem and devotion? Wouldn’t it be a great sin to kill those who are relatives, who we loved so much? Even if I attain victory by killing them all, what would I gain from such a conquest? This would be against all my core beliefs.
“I cannot do this. This is not right,” he said to himself. The Gandiva, Arjuna’s divine bow slipped from his hands. He got down to his knees and expressed his dilemma to his true friend and mentor Krishna.
Arjuna giving up bow to Krishna2
Seeing Arjuna giving up his bow and sensing his inner conflict, in the middle of the battlefield Krishna spoke words to calm him down. Giving the teachings to Arjuna at that crucial moment, his divine dialog became eternalized as Bhagavad Gita, the Song of God.
The Bhagavad Gita is comprised of 701 shlokas (verses). These shlokas have been organized into eighteen chapters. The Bhagavad Gita is one of the best-known philosophical texts of Hinduism. It is said to contain the essence of the ponderous four Vedas and the 108 Upanishads.
The eighteen chapters are classified as ‘Yogas.’ The entire knowledge of the universe is packed into the Bhagavad Gita. It is supremely profound content, expressed in revealing language of comforting beauty and simplicity. The Bhagavad Gita can be understood and applied in all fields of human endeavor and spiritual striving, regardless of their disparate natures and needs. For those on their spiritual journey, the Bhagavad Gita sheds its light there.
Many classical and modern intellectuals have written commentaries on the Bhagavad Gita. Some classical commentaries are by acharyas such as Adi Shankara, Bhaskara, Abhinavagupta, Ramanuja and Madhvacharya. The oldest and most influential surviving commentary is by Adi Shankara.
Sanjaya & King Dhritarashtra3
The Bhagavad Gita is a record of the conversation between Arjuna and Krishna. It was being narrated to King Dhritarashtra by Sanjaya, who had been blessed by Sage Vyasa to have distant vision of the battlefield.
The Bhagavad Gita is one spiritual text everyone should be familiar with. Here we will provide a bite-size summary, condensing the essence of the Bhagavad Gita and the gist of its central themes. The purpose is to share the completeness of Krishna Avatar, as these teachings were given to us by Krishna himself. This compilation is based on a few English translations of the text.
The following are the eighteen chapters in the Bhagavad Gita.
Chapter 1: Arjuna Viṣhāda Yoga — The Yoga of the Despondency of Arjuna
Chapter 2: Sankhya Yoga — The Yoga of Knowledge
Chapter 3: Karma Yoga — The Yoga of Action
Chapter 4: Jñana Yoga — The Yoga of Wisdom
Chapter 5: Karma Sanyāsa Yoga — The Yoga of Renunciation of Action
Chapter 6: Dhyāna Yoga — The Yoga of Meditation
Chapter 7: Vijñana Yoga — The Yoga of Realization
Chapter 8: Akṣhara Parabrahma Yoga — The Yoga of the Imperishable Brahman
Chapter 9: Rāja Vidyā Yoga — The Yoga of the Kingly Science
Chapter 10: Vibhūti Yoga — The Yoga of the Divine Glories
Chapter 11: Viśhwarūpa Sandarśhana Yoga — The Yoga of the Vision of the Divine Form
Chapter 12: Bhakti Yoga — The Yoga of Devotion
Chapter 13: Kṣhetra Kṣhetrajña Vibhāga Yoga — The Yoga of the Field & the Knower of the Field
Chapter 14: Guṇa Traya Vibhāga Yoga — The Yoga of the Three Gunas
Chapter 15: Puruṣhottama Yoga — The Yoga of the Supreme Spirit
Chapter 16: Daivāsura Sampad Vibhāga Yoga — The Yoga of the Divine and the Demoniacal
Chapter 17: Śhraddhā Traya Vibhāga Yoga — The Yoga of the Threefold Faith
Chapter 18: Mokṣha Sanyāsa Yoga — The Yoga of Liberation by Renunciation
Bhagavad Gita book4
Let’s begin by looking at each chapter with a little bit of detail.
Chapter 1: Arjuna Viṣhāda Yoga — The Yoga of the Despondency of Arjuna
The first chapter describes the warriors of the two armies as well as the sounding of the conch signaling their readiness for war. It also describes Arjuna surveying both the armies.
Arjuna in despair with Krishna5
Nearly half of the chapter is about Arjuna’s misery. His mind leaning toward attachment gives him overwhelming grief about the atrocious task he is about to undertake. His misconception stems from his spiritual ignorance.
The Dialog
Arjuna says, “O Krishna, at the sight of these kinsmen, assembled here eager to fight, my limbs fail, my body is shaken, and my bow Gandiva slips from my hand. I cannot hold myself steady. I see signs of evil. I do not desire victory or kingdom or pleasures. What joy can be ours by killing these sons of Dhritarashtra and fathers, grand-fathers, teachers, uncles, brothers, sons, grandsons, companions, fathers-in-law, and friends? We have decided to commit a great sin where we are ready to slay our own family to satisfy our greed for the pleasure of a kingdom! I feel it will be far better for me if the sons of Dhritarashtra slay me in the battle, unarmed and unresisting.”
Chapter 2: Sankhya Yoga — The Yoga of Knowledge
Arjuna expresses the depth of his problem and surrenders to his friend and mentor, Krishna. Krishna explains the highest knowledge about the nature of Atma, the immortal Self, and the impermanence of all other things, including the body and the world.
He describes the necessity to fight the battle according to Kshatriya Dharma, and the principle of action without motive. Krishna stresses the importance of doing one’s duty, and the way to be a true Karma Yogi.
The Dialog
Krishna says, “O Arjuna! In this critical situation, why has this mental misery taken hold of you? Do not yield to weakness. It does not befit you. Arise, the scorcher of enemies!”
Arjuna says, “Bhishma and Drona are my teachers, fit to be worshipped. How can I attack them? My mind is confused and I am ignorant of what my duty is. So I ask you to teach me what is good for me. I am your disciple. I take refuge in you.”
Krishna explaining Atma to Arjuna6
Krishna says, “Never was there a time when I, you, nor these kings and men, did not exist. Never will there be a time hereafter when any of us shall cease to exist. The firm man who is not affected by anything is surely fit for immortality.
Arjuna, know that Atma is indestructible and pervades the whole universe. No one can cause the destruction of the imperishable. Atma is not born, nor does Atma ever die. Just as a man throws their worn-out clothes and puts on new ones, Atma throws away its worn-out bodies and takes other fresh bodies.
Weapons cannot cut, fire cannot burn, water cannot wet, wind cannot dry up Atma. You should not waver in doing your own duty. There is nothing higher for a Kshatriya than a righteous war. Have a mind that sees pain and pleasure, gain and loss, victory and defeat, likes and dislikes, in the same way, thus you engage in battle. Thereby you will not acquire any sin.”
Krishna continues, “Now hear the knowledge of Karma Yoga. By knowing this, you can cast off the bondage of work. You have the right to the work you do, not to the fruits of your work. Don’t let the fruits of action be your motive, nor be attached to inaction. Steadfast in Yoga, give up all attachments. Treating success and failure the same, do your job. Such level-headedness of mind is called Yoga. When your intellect becomes steady and resolute in interior concentration, you will attain union with the Supreme or Superconscious.”
Union with the Supreme, Superconscious7
Arjuna asks, “What are the characteristics of a man of steady wisdom, who has merged in the Superconscious?”
Krishna says, “As a man looks at sense-objects, he creates attachment for them. From attachment, desire for them arises. From desire arises anger, anger goes into delusion, from delusion comes loss of memory. From loss of memory comes destruction of discernment, and from destruction of discernment he succumbs.
When a man renounces completely all the desires of the mind, fully satisfied with his mind fixed in Atma, then he is declared to be a man of steady wisdom. When a man has no attachment to anything anywhere, and does not rejoice or hate when good or bad things happen, his wisdom is steady.
Having restrained all the senses, he sits steadfast, focused on Me. Whose senses are under control, his wisdom is steady and he attains peace. By peace and virtue, his mind is soon fixed in the Self. The man who lives completely free from desires, and without yearning, devoid of the sense of “I” and “mine,” attains peace. Having obtained this Brahman state, man is not deluded. Being established in this, even at the end of life, man attains oneness with Brahman.”
While I was doing deep internal work, it was the external world that showed me my spiritual progress. I was more centered and peaceful in the midst of life. Less reactive. Less needy. More decisive, simply knowing what to do.
Anxiety left me, for I wasn’t hoping to get something outside of me that would complete me – I felt complete within my own Self. A subtle level of bliss was always there, an undercurrent, under everything else in my mind. I could rely on this inner buoyancy, like I was floating in an extra salty sea. I used the world to help me gauge my deepening spiritual state.
Baba did it a different way. He used his inner experiences to gauge his spiritual progress. One of the reasons is that he had lots of inner experiences! Fortunately he wrote about them for us, so we can learn from his mystical inner expansion.
He had physical kriyas, spontaneous movements, classical yoga poses during his meditations. And pranayamas, yogic breathing patterns. He saw lights and colors, Gods and Goddesses, heaven and hell, other worlds and much more. One reason he did it that way is because he had 25 years of full-time yoga practice before he got Shaktipat.
I had 0 years before Shaktipat. Well, I had 4 or 5 months as I had started a yoga class a few months earlier. When I got Shaktipat, I had no clue what was happening to me. I loved it, but was at sea without a compass. Until I read his books and listened to his discourses.
Still, I haven’t seen all the things he saw. I’m not so visual as he was. I am more kinesthetic, so I feel my way inward. Like I can feel the Truth, rather than see it. For me, it’s a feeling.
And Baba emphasized feeling – bhaava. He said, “God is in your feeling.”
How do you know love? It’s a feeling.
How do you know happiness? It’s a feeling.
How do you know God? God is in your feeling.
This is why yoga gives you ways to get better at feeling. One way is by cultivating your proprioception, your ability to sense your body and its movements – the yoga poses do this for you.
Another way is by cultivating your energetic enlivenment. Your yogic breathing practice does this, giving you more prana, making you more alive. Baba said that every disease is due to…
— Excerpt from March 16 Satsang Discourse, available for viewing in our Deep Teachings Videos.
I remember learning how to float on my back. “Just relax,” they told me.
But when I relaxed, I folded in half and headed toward the bottom of the pool butt-first. If I stiffened, my whole body went under. If I kept kicking or moving my arms, I wasn’t floating.
I discovered there was a trick to it – a relaxing without caving in, an ease and feeling of surrender to the water. It’s a sweet spot that’s a lot like meditation. I don’t know if floating made my mind still or if I had to still my mind in order to float. But there is a trick to it. I’ll call it coasting the edge.
It’s the same edge that you coast when you’re watching the sunrise or sunset. You stay still for quite a while, as there’s nothing to do but watch and wait. The colors play across the horizon, brighten, darken and disappear.
Except, did you see it all? Or did you get so still that you lost track of the outside? There’s a trick to it. To truly enjoy the sunrise, you have to settle inside, yet still perceiving the glory playing out in front of you.
This is how you get enlightened — inside and outside at the same time. The magical moment where it is easiest to learn how to do this is at the ending of your meditation period. It is so magical that it has a name – vyutthana…
This is why some of you like to stay in bed after the alarm goes off. Or you don’t want to use an alarm at all. What’s happening? You wake up but you don’t move, hoping to drift back to sleep – but not really all the way to sleep, just sort of halfway in, coasting the edge.
This is a meditative state called turiya – it’s very close to enlightenment. It’s full of bliss, but it is unfortunately unconscious bliss. You drift on the edge for a little bit, then fall back asleep. You might use a snooze alarm to wake you again, so you coast inward again… and maybe again… how many times?
I call this snooze-alarm meditation. And when you do finally get up, you’re heavy and slow, a little dense and thick. It’s hard to get moving. That’s because you chose unconsciousness over Consciousness.
But if you get up early, especially before the sunrise, you choose Consciousness. So many of you are already waking up spontaneously at 3:00 or 4:00 in the morning. You may call it the middle of the night. Yoga calls it brahma-muhurta – the body of God. It is two hours…
The only neutral parties in the war were: Dhritarashtra’s younger brother Vidura, the ex-prime minister of Hastinapura; Krishna’s brother Balarama; and King Rukmi, the brother of Krishna’s wife Rukmini.
When Krishna abducted Rukmini according to her will, he defeated Rukmi. Ever since that, out of shame, Rukmi never returned to his father’s kingdom. He created another capital called Bhojakata and started ruling from there.
Krishna taking Rukmini1
Rukmi heard about the upcoming war and marched with his army to offer help to the Pandavas. His ulterior motive was to get closer to Krishna his brother-in-law.
Knowing Rukmi’s selfish attitude and arrogance, the Pandavas refused his help. Furious, Rukmi went across to the Kaurava camp and offered to help them. Since he went to the Pandavas first, Duryodhana also rejected his offer to help. With rejection from both parties, Rukmi returned to his capital, suffering dishonor.
Both armies pitched their camps opposite each other, leaving a vast land in between. Now they needed to find an auspicious day to do a special puja to the Goddess Kali to ensure a victory. Duryodhana went to Grandsire Bhishma seeking advice on this matter.
Bhishma advised there was no better astrologer than the Pandava prince Sahadeva, so to ask for his help in finding the best day for the ceremony. As Sahadeva is dedicated to righteousness, Bhishma believed that he would help Duryodhana with his unreasonable request.
Duryodhana silently went to the Pandava camp that night to seek Sahadeva’s help to find an auspicious day. Sahadeva welcomed Duryodhana wholeheartedly. Duryodhana, motivated by his greediness, spoke anxiously, praising Sahadeva’s expertise in astrology. Then he asked him to find him an auspicious day for Kali puja to ensure the Kaurava victory.
Sahadeva2
Sahadeva offered to help Duryodhana without reluctance, pulled out his Almanac and looked for a good day. After some calculations, Sahadeva said that the following new moon, which fell on the day after, was an auspicious time to perform the puja and to commence the war, as that would surely give Kaurava the desired victory.
Duryodhana left the Pandava camp with great joy, thanking Sahadeva profoundly. He was so certain that the war was already won. This event shows that not even Duryodhana had any doubts about the Pandavas’ innate nobleness.
First thing the next morning, Krishna and the rest of the Pandavas were told about Duryodhana’s visit with Sahadeva. Krishna pretended to be surprised and acted to show his dissatisfaction. Yudhishthira, on the other hand, embraced Sahadeva and praised him for upholding dharma even though it might cost them their lives.
Then he turned to Krishna and asked for his guidance and support.
Krishna knew that Yudhishthira would embrace Sahadeva for his righteousness. Krishna also instructed Yudhishthira to get the Brahmins to worship the sun and the moon that same day, as well as to perform rituals pertaining to the new moon instead of on the day after as per Sahadeva’s calculations. Yudhishthira and the Pandavas obeyed Krishna’s request and had the Brahmins do their rituals on that very same morning.
Sun God Surya & Moon God Chandra3
Seeing this, the Sun God Surya and the Moon God Chandra were very confused. They were troubled by Krishna’s actions and decided to come down to earth to ask him why he was encouraging the Brahmins to do this on the wrong day. When Krishna was confronted by Surya and Chandra, with a big smile on his face, he asked them, “When does the new moon occur?”
Surprised by Krishna’s question, they answered simultaneously, saying, “When the sun and moon come face to face together, that is the day of the new moon, as the moon cannot be seen at all. It appears invisible from earth.” With a big laugh, Krishna said, “You mean when you both come together, that is the day of the new moon, right? Here you are both together standing right in front of me. So, the new moon day is today, not tomorrow!”
The Sun God and the Moon God were confused at this straight definition. They both were taken by Krishna’s wits. That’s when they realized that he created this plan to help the Pandavas. They then departed to their respective abodes.
Uluka & Duryodhana4
Duryodhana was furious to hear about this incident. He was so angry that he decided to send Shakuni’s son Uluka to the Pandava camp to mock them. Uluka was to deliver a message to Yudhishthira saying that the Kaurava army is ready to face them, under the great command of Grandsire Bhishma.
In his message, he insulted the Pandavas, calling them cowards and calling their wife Draupadi a common woman. He also insulted Krishna, calling him a sorcerer. After hearing Duryodhana’s insulting message, Uluka departed with an uncompromising message from the Pandavas and Krishna to Duryodhana. The devastating epic war, as reported in the Mahabharata, was about to start.
In Hastinapura, Sage Vyasa appeared in front of King Dhritarashtra. King Dhritarashtra was very anxious about what was going on the battlefield. Seeing this, Sage Vyasa asked if the king would like to witness the war. If so, Vyasa could grand the king divine vision.
Dhritarashtra refused the offer, saying that it would be too difficult for him to watch his own families fighting and killing each other. But he was still interested in knowing the events on the battlefield. So he said he wouldn’t mind if someone could narrate all that was happening there for him, so he could be informed. So Vyasa blessed Sanjaya, Dhritarashtra’s minister, with clairvoyance, so that he could see the battlefield right from the palace and inform King Dhritarashtra of all the happenings.
Bhisma5
In the battlefield, Grandsire Bhishma was sitting on a silver chariot with white horses. His armor glowed like silver in the morning sun. He cheered the Kaurava army with encouraging words, saying to them to fight whole-heartedly, motivating them to walk in the path of their ancestors. He reminded them that either victory or heaven stands before them. The gate of heaven will be wide open for those soldiers who care less for their lives, so to fight with all their might and die a hero.
A true soldier never shows their back on the battlefield, fighting to their last breath. Death by a weapon is a soldier’s honor. Bhishma asked them to fight with joy, so to gain glory and honor. These words really made an impact in the Kaurava army. Encouraged by these powerful words, the Kaurava army marched with great confidence to the battlefield with shouts of victory and glory to Kauravas.
Battle dhvajas (flags)6
Each chariot of the warriors had their flag flying high and mighty. A flag is called a dhvaja, the symbol of a king or army that’s carried on a pole. Flags often depicted objects that represented the warrior’s skills, qualities, or affiliations.
Bhishma’s flag was a palm tree with a cluster of five stars around it, which symbolized his extensive knowledge. The symbol on Guru Drona’s flag was an altar covered with deerskin, with a kamandala (yogi’s water pot) and an archery bow on top, depicting him as a brahmin warrior.
Kripacharya had a humped bull on his flag. Ashwatthama’s had the figure of the magnificent tail of a lion. Duryodhana’s had a serpent representing strength. A golden moon with planets around it was in Yudhishthira’s flag. Bhima’s chariot bore a flag with a gigantic lion in silver. Arjuna’s flag had Hanuman, representing his basis for victory, a boon by Lord Hanuman himself. The flags flying all over battlefield announced the greatness of the warriors on it.
The following were the strengths of both the armies. Each army consisted of several divisions, called akshauhinis. Each of them had a particular number of ratha (chariots), gaja (elephants), thuraga (horses), pathathi (foot warriors and soldiers). An akshauhini or division included 21,870 chariots and chariot riders, 21,870 elephants and elephant riders, 65,610 horses and horse riders, and 109,350 foot-soldiers, in a ratio of 1:1:3:5. Therefore an akshauhini will consist of 218,700 soldiers.
Akshauhinis (divisions) of armies8
The Pandavas had 7 akshauhinis while the Kauravas had 11 akshauhinis. In essence, nearly 3.94 million warriors and soldiers took part in the great Kurukshetra War. Each akshauhini was under a commander or a general, apart from the Commander in Chief, who was the head of the entire army.
During the war, the weapons included: the bow and arrows, the mace, the spear and the sword. In each of the armies, these weapons were chosen by the warriors and soldiers as their primary weapon. Mainly the bow was chosen by Arjuna, Bhishma, Drona, Karna and Abhimanyu, with the mace chosen by Bhima and Duryodhana. The spear was chosen by Yudhishthira and Shalya, and the sword by Nakula, Sahadeva, and Uluka to name a few of the warriors.
Many military formations were used throughout the 18-day battle. At various times during battle, the Commander in Chief of either army ordered special formations, called the vyuhas. Each vyuha had a specific purpose: some were defensive while others were offensive.
Each formation had its specific strengths and weaknesses. Each formation required a particular number of ratha (chariots), gaja (elephants), thuraga (horses), pathathi (foot warriors and soldiers) placed in strategic positions. The following is the list of all the vyuhas used during the battle, each with a short description.
Krauncha vyuha (Crane formation)7
Krauncha Vyuha — heron or crane formation
Makara Vyuha — crocodile formation
Kurma Vyuha — tortoise or turtle formation
Trishula Vyuha — trident formation
Chakra Vyuha — wheel or discus formation in concentric circles. This is a critical vyuha that mattered during the war, with details coming later
Kamala Vyuha or Padma Vyuha — blooming lotus formation
Garuda Vyuha — eagle formation
Oormi/Urmi Vyuha — ocean formation, resembling the ocean’s waves
Mandala Vyuha — galaxy formation
Vajra Vyuha — diamond or thunderbolt formation
Shakata Vyuha — box or cart formation
Asura Vyuha — demon formation
Deva Vyuha — divine formation
Soochi Vyuha — needle formation
Sringataka Vyuha — horn formation
Ardha Chandraakara or Chandrakala Vyuha — crescent/curved blade or crescent moon formation
Mala Vyuha — garland formation
Sarvatobhadra Vyuha – meaning “safe on all sides,” a kind of a square array formation, in which the troops face outward in all directions.
You have already had many expansive experiences. Yoga doesn’t have a copyright on bliss. It simply makes the bliss more accessible and longer lasting.
The goal is to live in the constant bliss of your own Self. Bliss is your essence. Bliss is your nature. Anything that stops your mind makes space for the bliss of your own Beingness to arise inside.
If you’re not in bliss, your mind is messin’ with you. You’re chasing your thoughts instead of abiding in the spontaneous bliss of Consciousness. How do you want to live? You get to choose.…
For me, it all changed once I got Shaktipat. Having a Guru made life easier for me, both easier and more understandable.
Life was more understandable because I could see the bigger picture. It wasn’t about what was happening today, not even about “what’s happening to me,” but it was about where I place myself on the timeline. And the timeline was longer – spiritual development spans lifetimes.
It felt like, instead of a sprint where I exhaust myself as fast as I can, I was on a trek where I needed to pace myself – steady, consistent progress, taking care of my mind and body along the way. Yes, life became more understandable.
I also found life to be easier. This was because I had inner depth, so little things didn’t throw me off center anymore. It was like I became a Weeble. You remember the kid’s toy, “Weebles wobble, but they don’t fall down.”
Consider what happens if you don’t have a Guru.
You’re always looking for something, but you don’t know what you’re looking for.
You look everywhere because you don’t know where to look – inside.
Everything that happens is critical to your sense of self-worth, which depends on the outer world, which is always changing.
Other people’s opinions of you make you who you are. So you’re always trying to manage their minds, not merely your own.
And you look for escape hatches – ways to trigger bliss, peek experiences, p-e-e-k, but you don’t know how they work. Or what you’re peeking at.
This is called “normal.” It is also called bondage, that you’re tied up in knots, the gnarly knots in your mind and heart. And in your body. Yoga gives you a way to begin unraveling the knots. Yoga explains that there is something worth finding, but it is located inside.
Yoga gives you a peek at it, a glimpse of your own Self. And tools to attune yourself to your own Self, ways to progressively surrender into who you really are.
And yoga gives you proof. Proof that there is a destination worth going to, proof that there is a path and a process, and proof that the goal is attainable. The Guru is the proof.
— Excerpt from Expansive Experiences discourse 2/16/25
Both Arjuna and Duryodhana were in the room with Krishna, asking for the support in the war.
The choices were clear, Krishna would provide his army to one of them and his moral support and guidance to the other. But the question is, who gets to choose first?
Duryodhana was eager to go first, so he emphasized that he arrived earlier than Arjuna, thus he should get to choose first.
Arjuna, Krishna & Duryodhana1
Krishna replied with a smile, saying, “Of course, you did arrive earlier than Arjuna. But when I woke up, I saw Arjuna first, as he was standing at my feet right in front of my face. In addition, as you know, it is customary that the younger ones have the right to choose first before the elders.” Saying this, Krishna turned to Arjuna and asked him to choose first.
Krishna also went on and on about the military strength and bravery of the mighty Yadava army, at the same time reminding Arjuna that Krishna himself would not take part in the war. He would only give his moral support and guidance. So he asked Arjuna to take his time to decide whether he wants just him, Krishna, who was not going to take part in the fight, or if he wanted his mighty army.
As soon as Krishna stopped speaking, Arjuna, without a blink of an eye, said, “Oh mighty Krishna. I want you and only you. All that I want is you to be with me in the war, not your powerful army. Without you they are nothing for me. You are all that I need.” With an approving smile, Krishna gave his promise to Arjuna to always be on his side.
Hearing this, Duryodhana was surprised and delighted, thinking how foolish Arjuna was, not to ask for the mighty Yadava army. He was relieved and full of joy for receiving Krishna’s army. Without even thanking Krishna, he rushed back to Hastinapura to share this wonderous news.
The Kauravas were very pleased with Duryodhana’s choice, except for Vidura, Grandsire Bhishma and Guru Drona, who understood the consequences of Duryodhana’s choice.
Krishna’s brother Balarama decided not to participate in the war at all, as he couldn’t choose one party over the other. He decided to adopt impartiality and went on a holy pilgrimage to avoid taking part in the war. Thus, Balarama got himself out of this epic bloody war.
King Shalya3
The news of the war reached the ears of Shalya, the king of Madra Kingdom. He was the maternal uncle to the Pandavas, as the brother of Queen Madri, who was the second wife of the late King Pandu. Nakula and Sahadeva were born to Madri, who had become “sati,” meaning she threw herself on her husband’s funeral pyre.
King Shalya immediately gathered his powerful army and started marching towards Upaplavya to join the Pandava army. The news of Shalya’s army marching towards the Upaplavya reached Duryodhana’s ears. He decided to somehow get King Shalya and his army to fight on his side. He immediately devised a plan to win over King Shalya in whatever ways he can.
With the help of Shakuni and Karna, he ordered his men to facilitate Shalya’s soldiers and serve them in every possible way when they passed through their area. Shakuni and Karna made sure of that. Their army kept the tents ready even before Shalya and his army arrived. They were ready to provide food, refreshments and other services.
When King Shalya arrived, he thought this was his nephew Yudhishthira’s work. Delighted by all this hospitality, Shalya asked the men to thank their king. He also asked in what way he can help their king? Promising whatever their King might ask, Shalya said he would deliver.
Duryodhana & King Shalya2
Poor Shalya was devastated to learn that the people who served him were none other than Duryodhana’s servants. Shalya was astounded, but he was compelled to fulfill his promise. He regretted his poor judgment.
Of course, Duryodhana wanted Shalya and his army to join the Kauravas. With a heavy heart Shalya agreed, but told Duryodhana that he had to go visit his nephews, especially after what they have gone through for so long. Shalya said it was his duty as an uncle to visit them and comfort them on their misfortunes.
Krishna, Dryshtadyumna & Pandavas4
When Shalya arrived at Upaplavya, all the Pandavas were so delighted to see him. They were thrilled about his visit and found comfort in his presence and kind words. They were so joyous, thinking that their uncle’s massive army could be a game changer for them. But their happiness didn’t last long, as Shalya explained to them how he was tricked by Duryodhana to fight the war on the side of the Kauravas.
Nakula & Sahadeva5
The Pandavas couldn’t believe what they were hearing. They were shocked and heartbroken to hear about what took place. Shalya was embarrassed and remorseful about what had happened. He apologized for his mistake. He was so willing to help them in anyway except fighting for their side. The thought of Shalya fighting along with the Kauravas itself brought agony to all of the Pandavas, especially Nakula and Sahadeva.
Accepting the situation as it is, Yudhishthira had a request to Shalya. He humbly asked Shalya that, if there would ever be a situation during the war that he becomes close to Karna, for Shalya to praise Arjuna in order to infuriate Karna. Yudhishthira requested Shalya to keep telling Karna of the glory of Arjuna. Yudhishthira said that this itself would take care of the loss that they were incurring due to Duryodhana’s cunningness.
In preparation for the war, the Pandava army was divided into seven divisions. Each division had a General: Drupada, Dhrishtadyumna, Virata, Shikandi, Satyaki, Sekithanan, and Bheema. Now it became time to decide the Major General for the entire army. So they started discussing about it, with many names suggested. Some of the names suggested were Virata, Drupada, Dhrishtadyumna, Shikandi.
At the end Krishna was consulted. His choice was Dhrishtadyumna, which happened to be Arjuna’s choice as well. So King Drupada’s son Dhrishtadyumna was officially appointed as the Head of all Generals. He was the right choice as he was full of rage toward the Kauravas for insulting his sister Draupadi and sending her and the Pandavas to forest for thirteen years. His blood had been boiling for revenge for thirteen long years. When his appointment was announced the whole army made loud noises in appreciation. The elephants started to trumpet. All sorts of delightful instruments were played. It was indeed a celebration.
Bhishma7
In Hastinapura, there was no question about who the Major General for the Kaurava army would be. Grandsire Bhishma was named as the Major General in no time. Because of the vow he had taken, Bhishma didn’t have a choice but to fight with the Kaurava army in favor of the Hastinapura kingdom.
Bhishma agreed to be the Major General, commander in chief for the Kaurava army with two conditions. He said to Duryodhana, “Listen Duryodhana, Dhritarashtra’s sons and Pandu’s sons are the same for me. Even though I am fighting with the Kaurava army, I will only kill the Pandava soldiers, I will not harm the five Pandavas at any cost. They will remain safe in my watch. The second condition is that Karna will not be allowed to enter the battlefield as long as I am in command.”
Bhishma gave the reason why Karna was not allowed to fight alongside him, that Karna never showed any respect to Bhishma or his opinions. Duryodhana was not too happy about this. But when Karna learned about this condition, he consoled Duryodhana and said he would never ever fight as a warrior in the Kaurava army while Bhishma was in command anyway.
Duryodhana didn’t have any choice but to accept both Bhishma’s and Karna’s demands. The Kaurava army started to march towards the battlefield of Kurukshetra.
War about to begin6
Once both armies arrived at the battlefield of Kurukshetra, a code for the war was discussed and established. Both sides were expected to uphold the principles of dharma, righteousness, duty and integrity. Time limits were set. Fighting must begin at sunrise and end at sunset. At night, there should be no battles engaged at any cost. The troops could be friendly with each other after sun set.
In a duel, both warriors must have the same weapons and be on the same type of mount. One in a chariot could fight only with one who is in another chariot. If one is on a horse, he could only fight another on a horse. You could only fight with someone who is well as equipped as you. No one should attack a person who is bare handed.
Multiple warriors may not attack a single warrior. Protect the ones who surrender; no harm should be done to them. Do not injure or kill the ones who are leaving the battlefield. One should always strike an opponent only after warning him. They should never strike without warnings.
Do not attack those who carry weapons, supplies or other war material to the battlefield. Any medical personal should not be harmed while roaming in the battlefield or helping the wounded. Honor the campsite where the wounded soldiers were treated.
Both armies took their pledges to abide by the code of the war. Promising to respect the rules by indulging in a fair and moral battle.
When you meditate, especially in the early morning while it’s easy to coast the edge of Consciousness, you can dive deeper into the Consciousness that you are. After meditation, your mind doesn’t Velcro to stuff in the same way.
Velcro is a good analogy. I’ll describe a thought as a ping-pong ball that’s covered with Velcro. The Velcro strips come in two varieties – hooks and loops. One strip has lots of little flexible plastic hooks. When you lay it on the other strip, which has lots of little flexible plastic loops, the two strips grab onto each other.
Let’s say your ping-pong ball of a thought is covered with the Velcro loops. When it flies through your mind, it’s like the inside of your skull is lined with Velcro hooks, so the ping-pong ball gets stuck.
But after meditation, there are no hooks in there anymore. So the ping-pong ball flies through and it doesn’t get stuck. Even a thought about pain comes flying through, “Pain. How’s that pain I had yesterday?” And your mind, expansive and full of light just doesn’t grab on.
You can realistically assess the condition of your neck or knee, or whatever mental-emotional issue that was so debilitating yesterday – but without the reactivity quotient.
Pain is 10% sensation and 90% reaction.
If you’re not reacting, your ability to deal with the 10% is much improved. And you may need to go to the doctor, or go back to bed, or call someone and talk it through – but you’ll be better able to tell what is needed.
Why?
Because you are more than your pain. There is more to you than your pain. While you may have pain, you are not your pain. You are more, so much more.
I remember going through this one morning as I was…
Yoga’s promise is freedom. But there is no freedom without bondage.
People who live in oppressive situations long to be free, whether they are in a political quagmire or if they are in prison or merely trapped in a job or relationship that stifles them. Or their own mind. If you’re not in bliss, your mind is messing with you.
Yes, anyone who is in bondage longs for freedom, even strives for freedom. Even the critters want to be free. I lived in San Diego for many years. In one beach town, called PB or Pacific Beach, there are a lot of outdoor cafes. One of the best parts of the meal was when the local flock of parrots would arrive overhead.
Fifty or sixty birds, all very noisy, all different sizes, from the giant macaws to the smaller Amazon greens. They flocked together. And when they flew in, landing on the rooftops and utility lines, you couldn’t hear your friend talking. The parrots were so loud, clearly having a good time. Cawing, yes. Singing, whistling, and talking – clearly they had been pets that got out somehow.
One day I was driving down a side street and saw a man outside, holding some bird treats in his hand, calling lovingly to a big macaw on a street light overhead. “Come on home, sweetie pie… Come on home…” But the bird wanted to be free.
So do you. Even if you aren’t confined by others or limited by external circumstances, you long for freedom. This impulse to freedom, the desire to fly high, to expand to the sky and beyond – it’s built into you. It is your own inner knowing of your own Self, Consciousness arising within, ready to blossom, ready to shine, effulging forth from your own Divine Essence. Oh, Shiva.
This longing for liberation is what propels you into spirituality, into seeking, into finding a place like this that offers answers – so you can see if these answers match your inner itch…
Krishna returned to the Pandavas and explained the situation in Hastinapura. He also delivered Kunti’s message about the war.
Kunti wanted Yudhishthira to always uphold justice, while not giving up on his rights. She had also mentioned not to forget that he is a Kshatriya and that his brothers are his supports. If peace efforts fail, he must not fear to fight to preserve his rights.
She also instructed Krishna to tell the Pandavas that all her blessings are always with them. She sent a message specifically to Draupadi as well, saying that the disgrace done to her will be duly justified to her satisfaction.
Yudhishthira became discouraged due to the failure of the peace talks. His hopes for peace were totally erased. It was now time to start preparing for the war. For this they must build an army.
In the meantime, Kunti was in Hastinapura, not knowing how to accomplish what Krishna had asked her to do. She decided to confront the situation to the best of her ability. She planned to visit Karna.
She dreaded the consequences of the war. She knew that Drona would not kill her sons because they were his favorite disciples. Grandsire Bhishma would not kill his own grandsons no matter what. The only other person who had the ability, since Vidura was not going to take part in the war, was her eldest son Karna.
So, her fear was all about Karna, who had been a loyal friend to Duryodhana and had supported all his evil deeds all along. He considered Arjuna to be his arch enemy and had vowed to kill him.
By visiting Karna, she thought she could persuade him to change his mind and to join his own brothers, the Pandavas. For this, she had to reveal who she is to Karna. This was very hard for her as she had been hiding this secret all these years. Now she wanted to reveal it to prevent her sons from killing one another.
While battling with her inner conflicts, she decided to move forward and visit Karna. She went to the riverbanks of Ganga where Karna usually did his morning prayers to the Sun God. When she reached the riverbanks, she saw Karna praying, standing in front of the sun. He was immersed in a deep meditation with his eyes closed.
She stood right behind Karna’s back to be shielded against the blazing sun. Karna stayed in his meditative state until he felt the warmth of the rising sun on his face. When he opened his eyes slowly, he felt that someone was standing right behind him.
He turned around, looked closely at the woman who was standing behind him and realized that it was none other than Kunti, the mother of the Pandavas, the Queen of the late King Pandu. He immediately gave his salutations to her and greeted her formally, then asked how he could serve her.
In a feeble voice, full of tears in her eyes, Kunti revealed to Karna that she was his birth mother. She said to him, “Karna you were never the son of Radha. You are the son of Kunti. You are my son, my first born. You were born before my marriage, from a boon by the Sun God. The five Pandavas are your brothers.
“Because of my fear of social disgrace, I did an unthinkable, unjust action to you. Now it’s time for the world to know who you are. It’s time for you to join your own brothers. You have lived under the influence of the Kauravas, making you an enemy to your own brothers. Now it’s time for you to join your brothers and defeat the Kauravas. You will be the heir to the throne and your five younger brothers will be at your command.”
Karna couldn’t believe what he was hearing. All along somehow, he had known that he was a kshatriya, even though he was raised as a simple charioteer. He confessed that his longing desire to be a kshatriya had come true.
Hearing the word, “my son” from Queen Kunti filled his heart fully. Yet he could not hide from the fact that his own mother set him afloat in the river Ganga. It was his foster mother Radha who gave him the mother’s love, affection and care which brought him up to who he is now. So, he asked Kunti why she was revealing the secret to him now. What does she want from him?
With tears running on her cheeks, Kunti explained that the fear of the society kept her from telling the truth to him and the world. But the feelings and love she had for him never changed. She emphasized that the rest of the Pandavas were his younger brothers and that she couldn’t bear the thought of Karna killing his own brothers before her very own eyes.
She complained to him that Duryodhana refused to accept any peace attempts and the war was imminent. Duryodhana never listened to his father nor the elders. Because of this, the war was going to be brutal. So she again emphasized the importance of Karna joining his brothers in the war.
Hearing this patiently, Karna said, “I believe you when you say that you are my mother, but many others also have in the past said it and failed the test. The shawl that I am wearing now is the shawl I was wrapped in when my parents found me floating in Ganga. This will burn anyone who wears it, except for my mother. Would you mind going through the test?”
Kunti nodded and took the shawl and wore it with tears running down her face. Nothing happened, so she passed the test, verifying that she was Karna’s biological mother. Karna fell on his knees and touched Kunti’s feet, with tears running down his face, giving his pranams to his newly found mother.
Kunti embraced him and gave her heartfelt blessings to him. But Karna’s face was filled with mixed emotions — boundless joy, yet full of sorrow. Joy that he had found his mother and sorrow that he was not going to be able to fulfill his mother’s first wish.
Karna said, “Mata, I cannot betray Duryodhana. It is my duty to repay my debt to him even if I must sacrifice my life fighting by his side. How could I not do that when he’s the one who saved me from many situations where I was disgraced and looked down upon.
“When Kripacharya forbade me to take part in the competition, Duryodhana made me the king of Anga. How could I ever repay him for such generosity? He gave his friendship to me and I to him. What you are asking from me is something unthinkable. I am extremely sorry I cannot comply with your request. Is there anything else that I can do for you?”
Hearing this from Karna, Kunti’s heart was filled with despair. She was shaken by Karna’s loyalty & love for Duryodhana. She was heartbroken; all her hopes were crushed. She looked miserable.
When Karna saw this, his heart was broken as well. Refusing his birth mother’s request was not something he wanted to do. He was hurt that he was hurting his mother’s feelings. So he decided to console his mother. He asked again if he could help her in any other way except joining the Pandavas in war.
Kunti, being a Queen herself, was able to get herself together. She gained strength and asked Karna not to use the Nagastra Astra (Bow of the Serpents) on Arjuna more than once. Karna not only agreed to that, but also promised that he would not kill any of his brothers except Arjuna.
He said to Kunti, “as the fight between Pandavas and Kauravas is unavoidable, one of us is certainly going to die. It would be either Arjuna or me. You will continue to have five children whether he dies or I do.”
Hearing this consoled Kunti somewhat. Full of emotion and gratitude, she embraced Karna closely and said, “What must happen will happen.” She had no words to thank him for promising her that he wouldn’t kill four of his younger brothers.
Karna also had a request to ask of Kunti. He asked for a boon from Kunti that, if he were to win the war, for her to announce that he is her first-born. But if he were to die, she would hold his head in her lap and announce to the whole world that he is her son. Until then it should remain a secret. Kunti, full of tears, agreed silently and left with a heavy heart.
Both the Kauravas and the Pandavas started to build their armies, preparing and strategizing for the inevitable upcoming epic war. One of the most important tactics was to make alliances with powerful kingdoms. Kings from all over the land started their journey to join one of the armies, according to their preferences and allegiance.
The Yadavas were considered one of the powerful armies in the region. Due to this, both the Kauravas and the Pandavas wanted their support in the war gravely. Therefore, both Duryodhana and Arjuna came to Dwarka to ask for Krishna’s help in the war.
Duryodhana arrived first and found that Krishna was enjoying his afternoon nap. As he was asked not to disturb Krishna, Duryodhana sat on the bed by Krishna’s head. While waiting for Krishna to wake up, Arjuna walked inside the room with the same intention. As Arjuna adored Krishna with utmost respect, Arjuna went and stood near Krishna’s feet.
After some time, Krishna woke up. His eyes fell on Arjuna first because he was standing at his feet. Krishna was delighted to see Arjuna and greeted him, asking for the reason for his visit. Duryodhana immediately jumped in, saying that he was the one who arrived first and the reason for the visit was to ask for Krishna’s help in the war. Only then Krishna noticed Duryodhana who was sitting on the bed beside his head. Krishna smiled and greeted Duryodhana too.
Arjuna then humbly stated that he was there to seek Krishna’s help in the war as well. Krishna smiled and said that they were both very dear to him, so he will help them both. This confused both Arjuna and Duryodhana.
Seeing their confusion, Krishna told them that he and his mighty army (Narayani Sena) would fight on different sides. He continued, saying that he himself would not take part in the war. He will provide his army to one of them and his moral support and guidance to the other.
Now the question is who gets the mighty Yadava army and who gets Krishna, his guidance, and his support? Most of all, the question is who gets to choose first.
