From Fear to Freedom

By Mati (Sandy) Gilbert

I was born with a sense of being incomplete.  Something was missing in my life.  It turned out to be my spirituality.  Over the years, I tried many and varied methods to fill this void.  Most didn’t work,  some did for a short while.  Then the old sense of incompleteness came back.  It wasn’t until I turned to yoga, poses at first, then meditation.  Eventually, I found the inner yoga.  It placed me on my path to knowing my inner divinity, my Self.

Shiva Sutras 1.5: Udyamo bhairava.h
When the Guru’s Grace is received, one’s inner Shakti is unfolded… meditation comes spontaneously… the seeker turns within.  Awareness of the inner Self begins to throb all the time within him.  To stay in this awareness is the right effort for the seeker.  — Swami Muktananda

Why did it take me so long to find what was missing?  It was fear.  Some fears are small and others larger.  Some go away and some stay around for many years.  My greatest fear was my feeling of being incomplete.  It took the awakening by a Master Teacher to allow me to begin to understand what was missing, why it is so important, and the steps necessary to feel complete.  I had to put myself in the hands of someone who knew how to put me on the path of self-realization.

The world is made of energy. You, as part of that world, are made of energy.  When your inner spiritual energy is activated and unfolds within you, the experience of the wholeness within is clear.

Swami Nirmalananda says, “Yoga calls this your own Self, your Divine Essence.  You were born to know your own Self.  You were born with a feeling of being incomplete so that you would look for your Self.  Finding it is easy when you work with someone who has already found it.  That’s what my Guru gave me and what I give to others.”

While you are made of energy, there is a hidden dimension to that energy that must be activated.  This mystical upward rising energy is available to everyone.  Once awakened, this upward rising energy is like “Old Faithful in Yellowstone National Park, the world’s most recognizable geyser.  While it is not the highest geyser in Yellowstone, it is by far the most regular.

Your upward rising energy has a name — Kundalini.   It moves upward, starting at your tailbone, through your spine, your conduit to Consciousness.  This Divine Energy melts away your inner blockages, revealing your own Beingness.

Shaktipat initiates the awakening of your dormant energy.  It is a rare and special blessing, given by those who have dedicated their life to carrying the ancient yogic tradition to the next generation.  Swami Nirmalananda is such a Master.

There are two types of Shaktipat – intentional and spontaneous Kundalini.  Spontaneous Kundalini can occur when you hear of such a Master, if your practices thus far have prepared you enough.

Intentional Shaktipat happens when you ask for Kundalini awakening by an authorized Guru. With the transmission of this power of Consciousness, meditation comes easily.  You turn within.  Your fears dissolve.  You become aware of the Inner Divinity that is your true identity, progressively more and more, until you live in the knowing of your own Self all the time.

You start out with an early impulse that something is missing.  You search out alternatives and read how to books.  Your desire to know is coming from a deep impulse arising within you.  What is that impulse?  It is your own Self (named Bhairava in the above sutra) which moves you forward, as well as inward, so you can discover who you really are and have always been.  Shaktipat propels you farther and faster than you can ever go on your own.  It is the gift of Grace arising within.